new kid in the blog~

holidays, semester breaks = boredom.not so many people agree with that one tho : P so here i am,writing some shit, thanks to the "wonderful" liburan that ive been waiting for the last 5 months!

i've been reading this money-making-motivational-book titled "think and grow rich" by Napoleon Hill.good book to read tho,well,if u have nothing to do like studying the anatomy and physiology books for your anatomy exams or something? : P the one point that is strongly mentioned in this book is "DETERMINATION". I've been quite a loser lately,either in love,or in study.I dont know what the hell is wrong with me,but somehow,these "things" connect each other very well,and hugely affect my life..i've been talking to friends,family,and some strangers : P but i still dont have the answer to solve this catastrophic problem of mine! i'm not sure which one is my number one priority..i'm a student,yes,but i'm 20 years old! this may sound cheesy,but i wanted to be loved too....achievements,achievements...am i too greedy?or just being paranoid by THE BIG LOSS

so...determination...which path will i lead it to...?is it to my troublesome-love-life that brings me joyful happiness but huge cut deep inside when shit happens?or is it to my so called noble-lifesaving-hero-of-the-day medical studies that crammed every single neuro cells that got me fever when the once-every-two-weeks exam comes?why is this life so f*cking stressful!every one was like saying "hey,u're a guy,u study medicine,and u have problems with girls?sheesshh...".Like..what the hell does studying medicine got anything to do with having a girl who really loves you? People!the materialism era may have just begun,but i don't believe in such cheap-minded-thinking....just be honest to your feelings,and live a happy life.

There's this one story in this book about Thomas Edison and his business partner.this guy,named Mr.Barnes came all the way from nowhere and headed to New Jersey just to persuade this Edison guy to be his business partner,without a single penny in his pocket,like what the malay called "modal-air-liur".This Edison guy noticed that burning desire showing all over this "air liur" Barnes and decided to give this guy a job,well,not his business partner!to be one of his employee. As time passes by,this determination of Barnes never fades away,but it keeps growing and growing....One day,Edison wanted to sell his some-type-of-communication-device but failed to persuade his salesmen to sell them to the public. Mr.Barnes,saw this opportunity, and offered himself to sell it for him,which end up to supply him with pots and pots of money.happy ending~the point is,one have to be determined to get whatever he or she wants.The question remains.....what exactly do i want?